25th august 2007...
Had a flight to catch at 10.30pm....I was about to leave for the US of A in a couple of hours.....for my MS in University of Cincinnati......With a gang of 11 ppl accompanying me till cincinnati, there was a picnic-tour-kinda excitement filled in me [:p]......with lotsa confusion prevailing evrywhere with the sudden bomblasts at a couple of places in hyderabad, there was more tension filled in the air than the sorrowful currents expected at that time........with all the roads packed with the typical hyderabadi traffic, the drive seemed adventurous with lotsa brainstorming taking place in my mind.....grazing the checklist, receiving the innumerable number of cals, giving last minute instructions to my bro.....n consciously or unconsciously refusing to register the hard fact in my mind tht i am actually leaving everyone for a minimum of 2 yrs.....
Reached airport....after a photo session n all infinetly growing instruction set from the family + relatives + friends, finally it was time to leave.....the final boarding time was almost closing in......more involved in meeting n getting introduced to the would-be-freinds, i slowly moved into the hall heading towards the checkin section after bidding a cheerful bye to all my loved ones.....yashu was allowed to stay with me till the final boarding cal due to spl permission managed by one of my friends :).......n we spoke for sometime.....a very casual talk.....n finally i started to leave after giving him an affectionate kiss.....n thts when he told me tht a surprise gift was secrety placed in my cabin baggage :)).....increasing my excitement beyond bound......he knws hw much i love surprises :)))......
waiting in the boarding room......i opened the baggage to take out the gift......beautifully wrapped with a cute giftwrap, i cud feel the auro of the love.....i opened it to find a small case and a small handwritten letter.....n the case bore something which was least expected......it contained a beautiful diamond pendant [:))))]......cudnt believe my eyes.......cudnt switch my gaze off the pendant....slowly i opened the letter attached.......the letter written by a brother to his sweetestheart.......n the sweet note brought me out of my reverie......the words made me realize what big deal it was........that i am flying off as far as 10,000 miles away from evryone......n that i cant meet all my beloved ones till min of 1 year....n that the life ahead is gonna be very diffent......n tht i will have to feel the absence of my bro beside me.......n tht i ll miss all the fun n his company......n tht i ll hav to wait for a year to even see him.......n there came rolling down a continous stream of tears with the sudden realization.....was almost choked with sorrow and fear and tension and despair and restlessness and a mixture of all negative feelings......cudnt do anything but cry......n indeed i was crying......crying real hard......crying and cursing the day my MS plan was born and this day when the plan became all real.....
yashu......whose companionship i am missing the most now......missing him soo badly.....a feeling which cant be expressed by mouth but eyes speak
......letting out tears when least expected......its been 4 months now......n i still feel lonely even amidst a crowd.......”missing you” seems so common and less intensive word......but cant find any apt word for conveying how much i miss him.......in fact i m missing myself.....he is the only person with whom i am myself......i be myself.....i act myself......i stay myself......i talk what i want to talk.....i do what i want to do.....coz he is soo much like me......he is exactly like me......n we like eachother's company soo much......n all of a sudden, i land in this foreign land.......with all new ppl around......m
aking his absence felt much more......i see him daily.......his cute face prompts my hand to touch him.....but i am obstucted by the flat screen of my lappy......i talk to him daily.....his sweet talk makes me kiss him......but the feel of flying the kiss thru the phone never gives the real feel......the feel of kissing your baby brother......
ok so coming to the point now ( aahhh it took soo long to start the actual topic :P)......i wished to let him know how much i m missing him........yesterday was his bday.....n my lonliest day ever.....n he is 20 yrs old now.....[:
o] he is growing up......but to me he is still like a baby :)).......he is my favourite.......i like him more than anyone or anything on this earth :D.......even more than cadbury's dairymilk :P........cant imagine life without him.......gives me confidence when i am down......makes me feel like the best person existing on the earth ( only next to him :P )......can remember all the things we did together.......n can only miss them more now.......the jokes understood by only both of us ;).....the chat and chat we always had ( 1
st chat corresponds to samosa ragada chat :P and second chat is yahoo messenger chat :D ).....the counters and anti-counters for eachother's jokes......the lingo which noone else understud ;).......the tears of pride mummy used to get watching our affection :D......the tears he used to get when i scored gud marks [:p :p].......the combined studies for my external exams [:p]......the cute fights.......the letter writing competition :P which i used to win unanimously :p......the dairy i used to write :P.....the lengthy conversations which i miss the most :(((......the confidence and attitude he always used to teach me :))......the way in which he us
ed to deal with things n cald it the smartest way :P.......the excuses we used to give mummy for freaking out everyday......all the activa rides when i used to sit behind and tell him how to ride it safely :P......all the car drives when we used to discuss everything under the sun( dnt ask if our car is topless :P........ under the sun means every topic possible :P)......the games we played together......chess in which i won over him :P......the memory game whose c
ards he remembers even now :P......the all possible card games we used to play for cash ;).......the money u used to lend me everytime i was broke......the way we were always partners in all crimes n mischiefs possible :P......the way we used to guess the culprit in all CID shows ;)......all the secrets which we shared with each other.......all the “wavelength” related discussion we had ;)......the way we used to wonder at how alike we and our thinking is......the way we enjoyed every second of our being together.......
And its been 20yrs now that i had been with him......every second having its own importance :))......hard to list down all the memories on paper but they definetly have their share of place in my mind :)).....writing about our relation had been an ordeal.....n i m sure i havnt done evn some justification in this blog.....coz its the most precious relation i cherish.....and describing it in words is a sure-failure task.....i am not so gud at words that i cn describe this love.....its all about being together for 20yrs.....its all about sharing everything.....its all about the perfect wavelength match......ITS ALL ABOUT BEING COMPLETELY UNDERSTOOD WITHOUT EVEN SPEAKING........ITS ALL ABOUT A SISTER-BROTHER LOVE
he is the reason i smile......he is the reason i laugh.....he is the reason i live......Some songs for him :))....
VIDEO - 1
VIDEO - 2
The following is a story narrated by yashu when he jus started talking....the cutest audio ever.....i jus luvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv it.....
VIDEO - 3
love u chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaala ra......
missing u bey.....:(((((
love u chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaala ra......
missing u bey.....:(((((
( Added 30min after publishing the above blog)
The following is the mail which yashu sent to all his friends after reading the above blog......ccing me in it......n i loved it soo much tht i cudnt help adding it here :D
Subject : The day i cried :D
" enti...the day i cried ani smiley ettadu ani thala gokkuntunnara...:P ante...inni telugu cinemalu chusi meeku eepatiki artham aipoi untadi ankuntan lendi..:P...those tears not sad tears...those happy tears..:)...(like i wud cry wen sme cute little gal says "i luv u" 2 me..:P...like dat ana maata..:)...happy tears means...tears which cme out coz of exceesive feeling wich is pleasant or smtimes wich is beyond ur control 2 limit it 2 ur heart..:D)...adi matteru...:) so....ika matter loki mohita laga jump chesthe...:P ninna rathri didi tho matladthunde...assalu...full senti tho start ana mata...dat...1st budday re...u nt ther...wid me...:(....nee chethho cake tinale ani..:(...(inka chala unnai...kani..meeku ivi chalu lendi..:P)...so chala sepu matladthunde...international call...1 n half hour ante...vodafone calling card lekapoi unte....ma intlo naku pelli fix ayyedi :D...so full cheppina...cheppina....chepthune unna..:)...enti visheshalu...em jarigina...ivi avi...:)...last ki...
yachu:"didi...manam idantha conversation...takkuva rates thone 150 oo 200 oo ayyi untade...antha worth A antava?" ani...(ante...ikkada meeru gamaninchalsdindi entante...nenu putti 1 day ne ayina..."over-action" lo chala pedda vaadini anamata:P)...appudu..
didi:"chi...150...200 rs em worth kadu....200$ worth" andi!:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D(appude nenu realise ayyanu....nenu entha pedda vadini aina...didi kanna chinnodine ani..:P:P:P)
so..ala ala..muddu mudduga matladeskoni....rathri 3am ki padukuntu talchukuntunna....jeejee(ante...muddu ga didi anamata..:) ) unte entha bagundu ani...assalu didi em gift ivvale ani mansu lo tittukuntune(:P) padukuntunna..:) kani....but...appudu naku teleedu...wat was in store 4 the next day morning!:))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))...(no!...didi din fly all the way 2 india 2 wish me...jus in case u fired dat wild gues!:P)...(ala kanna...ippudu chesina danike inka ekkuva happy unde nenu :P) ......
morning...11am...call lo matladthundeonline ra beh ani cheppi phone pettesindi...:)
manaki asale...holiday ante..chalu snanam ni dushman shushinsttu shustham..:)
so...direct comp meedake anamata...matladthunna matladthunna....voice chat anamata....:)
so..then..she sent me a link...dani blog di...cheppindi...nenu line lone unta...chadivi/...get bac 2 me ani..:)....
so...i opened...blog half chadivina tarvata...call cut chesesa...:D(if u din get y...refer 2 the subject of the mail :P).....i realised...melliga smthin is growin ani...the size of the drop wich was still inside my eye..:)....inka chaduthu chaduthu....the size incresed exponentially:P....n finally...oka fine sentence dagara ishtart anamata....:))))))))))))))))))))).....inka oka sari start aithe manam yedi aapam kada..;););)...heheheheh....inka full chatting danitho...asssssssssssssssssssssssssaaaaaaaaaaaaallllllllllllu emannnnnnnna undena!... abbbbbbbbbaaaaaaaabbbbbbbaaaaaaabbbbbbbbbb ..... so....DAT was my budday gift!!!!!!!!!!!!!:))))))))))))))))))))))))))))....n last lo dani dialogue.,.."nee budday roje iddam anukunna...:)..kani nee budday roju ninnu enduku edpinchadam ani ivvale:)"....asssssssssssssssaaaaaaalllllluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.......... :">:">:">:">:">:">:">:">:">:">:">:">....
so....adi andi matteru.....meeku intha cheppina tarvata meeku aa blog chadavali ani anipisthe address kinda undi..:D
itlu,eppuduki me muddula babu laao :)
(currently on my mind,heart n soul: http://k-harika.blogspot.com/ ) "
